Do YOU know HIM?

I have a Twitter. If you are older than like 25 you might not know what Twitter is all about. Twitter is a social media site where you can “follow” anyone. I do mean anyone and anyone can follow you. You post status updates (“tweets”) that can only be 140 characters long.
     Now, for example, I follow Taylor Swift, and many other famous people. Unlike Facebook Taylor Swift does not have to approve me to “follow” her. I just can. I can follow anyone. It’s kind of creepy but I can tell you lots of things about her because I read her Twitter Feed. But, I don’t really know her. She does not know me. Taylor Swift and I do not have a relationship. However, on the flip side I have a friend who does know Taylor Swift. She is actually really good friends with Taylor Swift, but again, I don’t know Taylor Swift.

Some people think they are saved, but in reality they follow Jesus like they follow people on Twitter. They know a lot about him. They know what he said and what he does. They have heard other people talk about him. THEY EVEN KNOW PEOPLE WHO KNOW HIM. But, they don’t have a relationship with him. They have never actually met him. They just know of him. I was one of those people for years. I went to church every Sunday morning and every Wednesday Night, but I didn’t know Jesus. I just knew of him. I knew people who knew him but I didn’t have a relationship with him. I wasn’t hostile towards him. I LIKED Jesus. There are a lot of people who are not saved that “like” Jesus. I listened to a pastor once and he said “People that are nothing like Jesus actually liked Jesus”. Which is a good thing. People are not hostile towards Christianity because of Jesus. They are hostile towards Christianity because Christians can be idiots.

Now some people say, yeah sure I know Jesus. I am a Christian. I go to church. Well let me just say that if you don’t have a relationship with Jesus then going to church doesn’t make you any better than the people who don’t claim Jesus at all. Let me get a little crazier here. If your relationship with your husband, wife, girlfriend, or boyfriend was similar to your relationship with Jesus would they stay or walk away? If you gave them the same amount of attention that you give Jesus would they still want to be with you? What about your friends? If you only called up your friends when you were in crisis how would they feel? They would probably feel used. What about with your kids? What if you only showed them love when it was convenient to show them love? What if you chose to only love them when people were watching but when you were alone with them you neglected them and ignored them?

God doesn’t want us to know about him. He wants us to know him; he wants us to pursue him like we pursue our most intimate relationships. In fact, he wants for us to have a more intimate relationship with him than we do with anyone else.

Make no mistake about it the relationship you have with Jesus is the only thing that is going to save you from hell and a meaningless life. When you stand before God you do not want to hear him say, “I never knew you”.

God Just ROCKED MY WORLD!

There have been a few times in my life where God has just rocked me. One of those times was in September of 2009 when I was 18 years old he RUINED ME! He saved me from hell and from a meaningless life. For 18 years I had been building up my kingdom and that night in a place with out a steeple and a room with out stain glass windows at a school that people from my home church had tried to talk me out of attending, I accepted Christ. I said to HELL with religion to HELL with reputation to HELL with my will(I am not cussing, I am just saying those things belong in hell and there is no room in God’s church for our religion, reputation, and will) and it hasn’t been a easy 3 years. I have strayed, I have stumbled, I have failed, I have done things that are just CRAZY, but God hasn’t left me. God hasn’t forsaken me. The only thing Jesus ever abandoned was a EMPTY TOMB! EVERY single time I have called out to him his comfort has surrounded me and his love has brought me to my knees.

So this brings me to tonight. I am going to say this at some risk, some of you will not understand the risk but I have been close to excommunicated from my hometown for saying this in the past.. They email me and “correct” me all the time. SO I am going to say it again because I MEAN IT! I LOVE NEWSPRING CHURCH! God has used the teachings of Pastor Perry Noble and Clayton King to change my life.  In fact Clayton King is also a campus pastor at Liberty and he preached and gave the invitation the night that I got out of my seat and ran to the alter.  ANYWAY back tonight. Around 11pm I had this genius idea that I would listen to a NewSpring sermon that I haven’t listened to yet. I will confess that I listen to some of them more than once because they are just that good. Now, I am not saying this was a mistake. I am sure it was God’s will that tonight I listen to that message, but seriously I could run a marathon right now. Sleep may not happen for me tonight. I am SO excited. I am SO pumped because I feel like God is telling me that he is going to do something incredible in me, and when it happens people will know that it has nothing to do with me. It will be God all the way. Let me just say this I AM NOT THE SHARPEST KNIFE IN THE DRAWER. I’m not. It looks like I will somehow make it through college (by the grace of GOD)! The people who know me will know that God is moving because I can’t move in the way God is calling me to move.  But, here’s the thing: I AM DONE. I am DONE with my will. I am DONE with trying to please people. I AM done walking around on eggshells in my own hometown. I am going to do whatever it takes to bring glory to God. I am sure I am going to stumble and fall and say things that people don’t like, and if I step out of line I will apologize, but I unapologetically say this: I am not going to set around and watch a generation of people go to hell because the church doesn’t like them. I am going to do whatever I can to reach people for Christ, short of sin. That’s what God has called me to do and that’s what I am going to do. I just wanted you to know. Proceed to email.

Mwhite13@liberty.edu 

12 Things God is Teaching Me

1) TITHE- Every thing you have is MINE anyway.


2) If it’s MY will then it’s MY bill


3) Don’t get discouraged when you mess up. Just get up and continue to follow ME. I knew every sin you were ever going to commit before I saved you-and I saved you anyway.


4) Remember how much I love the people who “annoy” you.


5) Don’t worry. I have a plan for you.


6) Let’s talk – Don’t forget to pray to ME. Especially when you are wondering why I am doing what I’m doing.


7) You didn’t earn your salvation. So, there is nothing you can do to keep it. I just love you.


8) Forgive those who hurt you and remember that sometimes forgiveness is a DAILY decision.


9) You are forgiven for EVERYTHING.


10) You are unconditionally loved – I’ve always loved you and I always will.


11) You are valuable – I paid a huge price for you. Don’t let anyone make you feel worthless.


12) You are MINE

STOP EATING OFF THE FLOOR

I was watching my friend’s 2-year-old son eat. I was kind of amazed at the amount of food that was on the floor vs. the amount of food that actually made it into his mouth. He finally decided he was done eating and asked to get down from his chair. After running a couple of laps around the house he came back to the kitchen where we were sitting and started eating the food off the floor. My friend scooped him up and said “Stop eating off the floor, I have a whole refrigerator full of things you haven’t even seen yet.” I laughed and thought nothing else about it.

However, on the way home that day I started praying. I pray A LOT these days. I’d like to say its because I’m just SO spiritual and in tune with the Holy Spirit or something but reality is that circumstances have kind of brought me to my knees. In my heart I keep going back to past relationships and mistakes and pretty much obsessing over things that I cannot change. As I was driving I felt the Holy Spirit convict me. “Stop eating off the floor.”

I realized that God is not trying to punish me for the mess I made.

Katy didn’t punish her son for making the mess. She wasn’t shocked at all. She knew what he was going do with the food when she put it in front of him. God knew I was going mess up, He knew I was going to make the wrong choice before I had the option.

He doesn’t want his child eating off the floor.

God has a plan for his children. He wants me to discover that plan and live in victory. He doesn’t want me obsessing over cleaning up my past. He loves me and wants to give me more than what I can give myself. All I can give myself is the dirty food on the floor.

What’s on the floor is not enough.

I can eat up everything on the floor but I will hunger again, because the floor is limited. The past is limited. You can’t add to it. What’s on the floor is not going to satisfy me. Only God can satisfy the spiritual hunger.

He has something for me that I haven’t even seen yet.

God does not want to hinder his children. I dare you to ask yourself these questions: 1) Is He Just God or 2) Is He FATHER God? Because if we believe that he is Father then we believe that he wants to provide. He doesn’t want to watch his children eat off the floor. When he has the ability to give us what we don’t even know we can have. He wants us to live in abundance but we have to trust him and give up what’s on the floor. 

Praying for you!

Dear Precious Child,

I don’t know you. You only exist in my heart and in my prayers. You haven’t been conceived and you haven’t been thought of by anyone except for me and maybe your grandparents and daddy. I don’t know your daddy yet so I wonder who he is going to be. I wonder if you are going to be a boy or a girl. I wonder if your eyes will be green like mine. I wonder if you will have dirty blonde hair like I have now, or blonde hair like I had when I was little. Heck, maybe you’ll have black hair or red hair but that would be up to your daddy! It’s funny how bad I want you. It’s weird that I already really love you. This world is kind of a scary place and who knows where you will be born and where we will live, but I am praying for you everyday.

I pray everyday that life will come easier for you than it did for me. I had some rough times probably because it took me a while to learn how to trust God. There were a lot of things about Jesus that I didn’t know until I got to college, but it’s okay because I know now. Your Mommy is learning how to love Jesus with everything. I am really seeking him and spending a lot of time with him these days. I can’t wait until I can tell you about what I am experiencing now because I know I will never forget this awesome time in my life. I struggled a lot but everything is making me so strong now. I just hope and pray that you don’t give in to Satan when he tries to harm you, and please, baby, never settle.

I pray that you will have an amazing daddy, but don’t worry, my dear, I promise I will not settle for a lazy man, or a man who doesn’t love and serve God. If I get my way (and I usually do) he will love Jesus more than he loves anybody (even you and me).There are a lot of fathers who set on the sidelines and just watch the years fly by. I pray that your daddy will actually be involved in every aspect of your life, and the life of any little brothers or sisters you may have. I’ll make sure he looks decent too so you wont have anything weird going on. ;) I’m just kidding, baby! You are going to be the most gorgeous creation ever! I promise to you that I will be totally committed to your daddy forever. I want to give you the best of everything and come hell or high water I will love your daddy forever.

I pray that you will love God. I really want for you to know God. I don’t want for you to just hear the stories and take them as fairy tales of some sort. I want you to have an intimate relationship with God. I want for others to see God in you. I want for you to grow up knowing that in Christ you can do anything and everything. I can’t wait to teach you about Jesus! I can’t wait to watch you learn about grace. I can’t wait to watch you get baptized! I can’t wait to celebrate your spiritual birthdays with you!

I pray that you always know how much I love you. We’re probably going to have fights when you become a teenager, and chances are they will be stupid fights. I know the fights I had with my parents were pretty dumb. I will always be on your side. You cannot lose me. There is nothing you can do to make me stop loving you, because you are mine and I will love your for the rest of eternity.

Well little one, I guess I will hold you in my arms in a few years. I’ll try to give you an awesome name that you will like but first I have to see your cute little face. Just know that I am patiently waiting for you and praying for you. Can’t wait to meet you!

Love,

Mommy.

Blame

I want to point fingers. I want to say that I wasn’t wrong. In fact, I was right, or at least that’s what I’ve been trying to convince myself of recently. BUT I am NOT innocent. I am guilty. The question that aches me is: “Am I the only guilty one in this situation?”

I've always been able to hold my feelings in and guard my heart, but lately I feel like I’m just going to vomit up everything that has gone wrong and it’s going to leave me bitter. I don’t want to be bitter. I don’t want to be depressed. I don’t want to be stressed and I don’t want to be angry. So with a short prayer I made a decision. I am going to accept ALL the blame and carry the weight of that.

Am I ready to accept ALL the blame? Is it really all my fault?

To answer that first question: Yes, I can handle that, even though it’s not easy. I can stand up and be an adult about all of this, I can carry the blame. Because, honestly I won’t be carrying it too far: I’m going to carry it to the CROSS, leave it there, and move on. Happiness, joy, and forgiveness, will follow and everything will be okay.

Is it really all my fault?

In all reality, no, it isn’t ALL my fault, actually in reality I am pretty sure that jury would be hung.

Is that the story I am sticking too??

No, I am going to stand up for my actions, my mistakes, accept my blame, and blame that isn’t mine. Ask God to forgive me and heal me and pray that he will forgive and heal on the other side of this situation too. I am going to pray that he will change our hearts, and bring us both closer to him, and keep us in his service.

He will forgive us, heal us, and continue to use us (more than likely separately) for his glory. Maybe, in time he may heal the relationship enough for us to be friends. Until then, He will remind us that even though hearts were broken, trust was betrayed, hurtful words were spoken, and hurt feelings were ignored: We are still Brother and Sister in Christ. That is the way we will remain…

17 things you might not know about me :)

My faithful readers have begun to complain about the fact that I have not posted a blog in like a month. I wish I could say that this blog was going to be something deep and theological but it isn’t. I am brain dead because of an intensive. SO anyway, I read another blog and that blogger made a list of random facts about herself, and I thought it was interesting. So I am going to try it.

1) I LOVE rolling down hills.

2) I sing and dance in the shower.

3) I am scared of birds.

4) I LOVE LOVE LOVE country music

5) I want lots of babies

6) I’ve got my mom’s eyes

7) I like vinegar in my soup

8) Lemons are by far my favorite fruit

9) I think ears are gross

10) Valentines Day is stupid

11) I eat Jalapeños out of the jar

12) One of my first words was “Walmart”

13) Kissing makes me laugh, sometimes

14) Lake Gaston is the most beautiful place on earth!

15) I have been proposed to with a pink plastic ring, in the kitchen of chick-fli-a and yes, I said no.

16) I am not a huge fan of politics, but I vote

17) Noises aggravate the crap out of me!

Hopefully you all know me better now!!